Me: I am thinking of becoming a….MISER!
Inner Self (IS): A miser eh??
Me: Yeah, would like to be one!
IS: Who is a Miser, as per you?
Me: Let me check, Wikipedia says a miser or cheapskate is a person who is reluctant to spend money, sometimes to the point of forgoing even basic comforts. Ok, I’d like to miss the second part. I want to live in comfort.
IS: Pretty strange. Nobody must be having this as an aspiration!!
Me: You are mistaken. There are scores of people who are and are proud to be one.
IS: Where exactly would you be reluctant to spend money, by the way?
Me: On people (other than my family and
close very close friends)
IS: But what has led you to this?
Me: Oh, hundreds of experiences with people around.
IS: What exactly will you do being a miser?
Me: Oh, lots of things like:
- At a restaurant, when with ‘friends’ will never take out my wallet/purse when ever its time to pay.
- Or will declare that I forgot my wallet at home.
- Or will finish my food ASAP and then do a vanishing act.
- Will never invite people to my home.
- In case, I do invite (once in a blue moon, which actually means once in 2.5 years!!), I will serve very little quantities of food and will serve the most economical veggie and dal of the season.
- When serving drinks, I’d pour the smallest quantity possible and offer snacks in the smallest bowl available!
- If somebody invites me for a party and says “No gifts, please, your presence is the only present we want!” …I’d promptly and religiously follow the instruction!
- If, I have to give a gift, I’d recycle the things that I have or will give the silliest and the Most economical gift. You know, I have 3 cartons full of them!!! Remember…Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth!??
- Will never pay the money that I owe to people.
- Will never offer to use my car for the car pool.
And sure I’ll innovate some more things to do during the course of time!
IS: Will you be able to do all these cheap things??
Me: Ya, why not? If people can do it with a panache, why not me??
IS: Won’t you feel embarrassed or ashamed at what your ‘friends’ might think of your acts, after all nobody is a dimwit, and you can’t fool all of the people all of the time?
Me: WHO CARES!?!?!? Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.
IS: But You Do Care! Don’t you know the three keys to more abundant living: caring about others, daring
for others, sharing with others. There is no joy in possession without sharing.
So just Aspirate this weird Aspiration out of your head!
Me: Yes Boss!