Friday’s 55 Fiction : Intimate Terrorism

55 Fiction is a form of micro-fiction that refers to the works of fiction limited to a maximum of fifty-five words.

Intimate Terrorism

It was the protocol.
His rants, which would go on and on; angry outbursts at any suggestion; criticizing or mocking her; trivializing her actions; the verbal and the physical abuse…
“How long can this go on?”, she wondered.
It HAS to end!
But when??
“Ma, will you play with me?” And she knew her answer.

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45 thoughts on “Friday’s 55 Fiction : Intimate Terrorism

  1. Hey! This is a poignant one!

    “And she knew the answer”… subtle yet hard-hitting.

    Again a socially relevant subject.
    The problem of domestic violence is often overlooked or denied. This is especially true when the abuse is psychological, rather than physical.

    Good one, Shilpa.

  2. Well,
    Though I didn’t understand it in the first reading, I got the point after giving some thought to it!

    Many people across the world are accepting domestic mostly for the sake of their family (esp. children or parents).
    Well, as no blogger generally concentrates on domestic violence, I must say this one was unique from the general “wholesome twist in the end” 55 Fiction!

    Some intense stuff here!
    Why don’t u try a whole story on these sensitive topics?
    It would be interesting!

    Cheers!

  3. Agony of every Indian Wife? I’m not sure. But this certainly is an agony of lot of women. As Shilpa rightly points out at the end, there are a lot of things that hold people back from ending it once and for all!

  4. @ Keith: Thank you for your feedback, Keith. I am glad you liked it.

    Yes, when there is psychological abuse, the victims suffer from depression, low self-esteem and self-confidence too! And yes, they can last a lifetime too!
    Sad! But it happens! 🙁

    @ asit dhal: True!! Victims need to seek help immediately. And even the abusers need help!

    @ pawan: Right you are, people stay in abusive relationships because of loads of reasons…family, children, social stigma, low self-esteem, financial status etc etc.

    A story?? Need to think about it! Thanks for the confidence though!! 🙂

  5. Hmm, your 55-Fs are subtle but have a lot of thought in them. I like the way you addressed this issue too.
    It’s so sad that these kind of instances are more real than fiction.

  6. @ Devashish Rao: Thanks Devashish.
    Well, it’s not the story of almost every Indian housewife, but yes, there are loads of women out there who are into such abusive relationships!

    @ Shankar: Thank you Shankar! Am glad you liked it. 🙂
    I guess, I need to be more lucid in my writing!! 🙂

    @ Aditya: Thanks a lot Aditya!
    Yup! Read somewhere that Abusers have some distinct characteristics like blaming, lying, excuse making, redefining the situation so that the problem is not with them but with others, often assume they know what others are thinking or feeling, usually think of themselves as strong, superior, independent, self-sufficient, and very masculine!!

    In fact, they need more help than the victim!!

  7. @ Shilpa
    Self sufficient and independence do not even feature in their minds because they cant do a thing without their women. Its the false superiority and false ego that women HAVE to serve them which makes them do all the atrocities. Thats why man invented the broom stick-a potential weapon for women 😉

  8. guys who are prone to wife beating will not stop at that. the child will be abused too… so often these days we read stories about these idiots beating up the wife and the children…
    so sad…
    thank you for bringing this topic on board. hopefully discussion will educate.

  9. it also insecurities of a common household…men of low self esteem and poor mental background resort to such inhuman actions…
    but I think that women should never keep quiet regarding this. In a way they set a wrong example for their children. I think it is a folly on part of them because on or the other day the children will understand will imitate their parents….and the unfortunate series won’t culminate…
    and I may be apologized for being so harsh but it doesn’t need an Einstein to understand such things..
    I actually don’t like people who say WOMEN ARE WEAK….

  10. We all realise that domestic violence is the worst act that can take place at home.
    Somehow,we have also begin to feel that women are weak.No,they are not weak,instead they are very strong and and follow certain rules.In their anxiety to keep the family happy and together ,they cut corners and adjust.
    Domestic violence seems to be a result of various economic and social pressures.

  11. ok Cheeks….
    i’ll stand up and clap for you….
    not because of the issue u took….but the way you wrote …the presentation and the beautiful summing up of the situation….the reality pf the situation….good good !!!!

  12. @ SiMbA tAgO: Thanks for your feedback Simba. I am glad you liked it.

    “All Indian Houses”…I believe, it’s certainly not all, but a big number would be more apt! What say??

    @ Sojo: Yes, you are right, it cant be every Indian wife!!

    Yes, breaking free from the shackles of such trauma and pain, (though very much needed) is not easy for everybody! Those who are able to do so, give themselves and their children a new lease of life!

    @ Vipul Grover: Thanks Vipul! 🙂

  13. @ Sid ‘Ravan’ Kabe: I know, nobody likes it! But still its prevalent in our society!

    Happy to inspire and yes, you may borrow the pic! Looking forward to your expression! 🙂

    @ Guria: Thank you, girlie!

    Oh, yes, Domestic Violence is real!!

    In a developed country like America also Women are six times more likely to get violated by intimate partners than men. Surveys taken from time to time have revealed 305 women get violated in Barbados, 29% in Canada, 34% in Egypt, 35% in New Zealand, 21% in Switzerland and 22% in United States. Surveys done in specific areas have also revealed figures as high as 50 and 70%!

    In India there is a crime against women in every three minutes, one rape every twenty nine minutes and one recorded case of dowry death in every seventy seven minutes. Cases of cruelty meted out by husbands and in laws are seen in every nine minutes.

    Patriarchal terrorism where one partner uses economic and social power to maintain control over another human is very common in India and other Asian countries.

    The world statistics of domestic violence translates into 960,000 reported incidences of violence, against current or former partners every year. Three million women are abused every year by their husbands or boy friends. Around one out of three women in the world has been coerced into sex, beaten or otherwise abused by their boy friends. Women are seen to be more vulnerable to intimate partner violence then men world over.

    http://www.domesticviolence.in/category/domestic-violence-statistics

    Sad! Very sad! 🙁

  14. @ Roshmi Sinha: Thanks!

    The issue of Domestic Violence is intense and hard-hitting too! 🙁

    @ Aditya: Yes, you are bang on target, Aditya.

    Research shows that abusers are likely to have some common characteristics. In general, abusers:

    1. Are less educated than the abused partner.
    2. Come from a lower socio-economic group than the abused partner.
    3. Need great amounts of attention.
    4. Are possessive, jealous and controlling of their partner.
    5. Fear being abandoned by the partner.
    6. Are emotionally dependent on the partner.
    7. Have low self-esteem.
    8. Have rigid expectations of the relationship.
    9. Have poor impulse control and low frustration tolerance.
    10. Are prone to explosive rage.
    11. Use children to exert power over partner.
    12. Blame their partners for their own abusive behavior.
    13. Lie to keep the victim psychologically off-balance.
    14. Manipulate the victim and others to get on their good side.
    15. If a man is abusing a woman, he often has very traditional beliefs about the roles of men and women.

    Oh! That’s quite a lot!!

    http://psychcentral.com/library/domestic_abusers.htm

  15. @ SG : yeah correct… i shud change tat… not all ofcourse… but yeah a major portion of indian housewives’ suffering..and that too a major from the villages and not-so-boldly but in cities too…

    jus that internal bleedings are not visible from the out until the exodus…………..

  16. @ Shahid Mukadam: Thanks Shahid.

    Yes, its more in cities as compared to rural areas!

    And voice need to be raised against it!

    @ magiceye: Thanks for adding a new dimension to the discussion.

    Domestic violence has a damaging effect on children and adolescents, both emotionally and psychologically.Children living amidst domestic violence are also more vulnerable to sexual and physical abuse.

    Children living in such circumstances show signs of distress and stress in their behavior. Their anxiety often manifests in the form of aches and pains, bed wetting, sleep disorders, aggression, cowardice or extremely childish behavior. They are seen to have temper tantrums and loose concentration.

    Boys from violent homes become disobedient and violent – and start using aggression to solve their problems. This they learn by aping adult behavior. Adolescent males can play truant and can succumb to drugs and alcohol.

    A girl child from violent home can withdraw from society and become completely depressed. Girls are seen to loose their self esteem and imagine physical distress. They can also become suicidal and have eating disorders. Females bottle up their anxiety and can get drawn into bad relationships as teenagers!

    OMG! It’s True…Domestic Violence Hurts Everyone! 🙁

  17. @ R S V: Yes, you are absolutely right about the psyche of the abuser and the woman accepting all the trauma.

    Accepting and going through their daily agony, I will not call it a folly. But its something they have decided to live with, due to various factors viz financial dependence, future of kids, social stigma, familial pressure…

    I am sure no woman would like to go through this kind of hell, but her circumstances compel her to do so.

    @ BK Chowla: Oh, yes Mr. Chowla, you added a new point…their desire to keep the family together, and may be a hope, that all this trauma would end soon, they compromise!!

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

    @ Aashima: Thank you girlie, your feedback and support means a lot! 🙂

    @ Lakshmi Rajan: Oh, that’s sad!

    Her answer: She will tolerate all the abuse for the sake of her child!

    @ SiMbA tAgO: Good to see you again!

    Yes, the internal bleedings are not visible. But the pain of the mind is worse than the pain of the body!!

  18. Quite an intriguing post. I knew the end even before I finished it.

    So so terribly sad but often women put up with it just for kids. It pains me when I realize that 1 life (a gift) goes wasted !

    Yet, I hope today’s women will stand up and fight for their rights. Abuser though husband/wife/father..is not God!

  19. @Shila

    In my opinion , she should not tolerate the abuses for the sake of the child. Inspite of all her efforts, if he still persists with his abusive behaviour, she should walk out of the relation atleast for the sake of the child. A child is better brought up away from such abusive characters.

  20. @ Lakshmi Rajan: Oh yes, she should not tolerate any such abuse. And am sure, she’d walk out too, for her own sake as well as for her child’s sake.

    But does she have the resources (financial, education, skills, family support) to take care of herself and the kid?
    Does she has enough confidence or self esteem to battle it out alone, after all these years of pain and trauma? Even her confidence and self-esteem might have taken a beating!

    If the answer is YES, she will walk out the very next moment.
    If the answer is NO, then you know her decision!!

  21. first time here…

    such a sad but honest truth about domestic violence…I have seen so many cases of this as a lawyer, and every time my heart cries out for females who have to go thru this…

  22. @ Neha: Welcome on “A rose is a rose is a rose!”, Neha!!
    Good to see you here! And I do see you on FB too! 😀

    Oh, you would know better, as you have first hand experience in seeing and listening to the sad tales of Domestic Violence!!
    My friend’s maid’s plight inspired me to write this post.
    It is truly sad and revolting!!

    From your experience as a Lawyer…Do these victims of Domestic Violence get their due?? I mean, do the abusers get any punishment??

  23. Very well written..
    After reading your last two 55 fictions, I am of the conclusion that you should break this bar of 55 words. I personally feel that you should write longer fictional stories..
    Great Work….!!!!

  24. well shilpa, do you know abusing is also an offense under domestic violence act? it protects the interest of a woman to a greater extent… but hardly any of them want to get their husbands arrested…the punishment is there, but money, power, society and love stop women to take any action…they might get their husbands arrested once, but later on they only bail them out…so far, only one case I have come across where a lady obtained a divorce, but didn’t go ahead with the complaint against her husband…

    btw, me too see u on fb often 😀

  25. @ Shilpa-ji

    You are right about other forms of abuse too. Mental abuse is rampant amongst us too, more in the “educated” class, something that the abused does’t even understand until much later, which is sometimes too late. I know people to have suffered from that. Husbands, even boyfriends. Of course, all done in name of love. Even the men are capable of emotionally blackmailing. It is indeed sad and a sorry state of affairs.

    Guria.

  26. @ Unseen Rajasthan: Thank you!

    @ chetan: Thank you and we should raise our voice against it!!

    @ Whats In A Name: Thanks.

    OMG! Thanks for the confidence! Will try sometime! 🙂

    @ indianhomemaker: Thank you and Welcome on “A rose is a rose is a rose!”

    Am glad you liked it! 🙂

    @ Neha: Oh, that’s a sad state of affairs! I guess, social stigma, financial dependence might be the reason behind women not complaining against their husbands! 🙁

    @ Guria: I agree!!

  27. The end is really good. It suggest both the possibilities. She will tolerate the violence for the kid or she will end it for the kid! Many women in India tolerate domestic violence and not have support or courage to end it but as a mother they have lot of strength!

  28. @evanescentthoughts: Thanks Avada!
    Yeah, a sacrifice of their right to live life for their kids!!

    @ pra: I glad you liked it Prashansa!
    I think about the future of their kids and hence continue to stay in abusive relationships! 🙁

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