CSAAM April 2011 – Did It Happen? I Hope NOT… NEVER
I had gone to a Watch shop to get the strap of my watch replaced. While the shopkeeper was doing the needful, I was looking around idly.
Just then a 10-12 year old girl in a school uniform walked in with a 25-26 year old man. This man had his arm around her and was holding her too close. What I found very disturbing, as soon as I saw this man was the sly smile which was plastered all over his face.
The girl was laughing a lot and was at ease with him, so I believe, she knew him. Next, I hear this guy asking her to select any watch she fancied and he clearly steered her to the showcase which had inexpensive plastic watches.
While the girl looked at the watches with a grin on her face, this man stood just behind her… rather too close and all the while caressing her arms. He was thoroughly enjoying whatever he was doing.
The girl oblivious to his sinister thoughts and actions was busy looking at the goodies. This whole scene shocked and repulsed me and I just couldn’t take my eyes off them.
I left the shop soon after but with highly agitated and disturbed emotions, thoughts and questions buzzing in my head… I just hoped… that I was completely wrong and the man and the lil’ girl shared a perfect healthy relationship… that the family could know of the guy’s bad intentions before anything happened to the kid… and that nothing wrong ever happened to that girl.
I also wondered… could I have done something at that point of time? May be said something to that girl or to that sick man? Or voiced my fear to the shopkeeper?? I don’t know, if all that would have resulted in something, but it sure makes me feel guilty still.
This incident made me all the more paranoid and vigilant about child sexual abuse.
I believe, being proactive in protecting our kids is the best way to deal with CSA. I prefer to take my son along with me (against his wishes, sometimes) rather than leave him alone with the servant at home. My antenna’s are always up and eyes keep tracking the activities and behaviour of kids. Keep sharing about the good and the bad things, the right and the wrong. And bottom line is to keep all channels of communication with kids open always!!
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April 5, 2011 7:55 pm|
Very disturbing. Especially when it is obvious that the abuser seems to be a known and ‘trusted’ person. Poor girl. Did she have a clue as to what was actually happening???!!!
April 6, 2011 12:16 am|
That really must have been disturbing. I can imagine. And what could you do? I think the only sensible thing, that would have had an impact would have been to call the police, nothing else could have a sure-shot result, I guess. I hope the poor girl remained unharmed!
April 6, 2011 2:24 am|
Pedophilia, necrophilia and such conditions are unique to this intelligent of species called man. When we use the term “animal like”, we in fact speak unjustly derogative of animals, don’t we?
What you mentioned is wise. Not to leave the child with the maid or servant.And interaction without fear is vital between the child and the parent.
April 6, 2011 3:11 am|
One does hear of such mischievous characters, but, historically most unfortunate incidents happen at the hands of close relatives only.All one can do is to keep a close check
April 6, 2011 4:35 am|
Anybody will do what you do. Specially in these times. One more thing might be done such as teaching the kid to tell the parents when someone talks or touches(god forbids!) them inappropriately.Kids growing up, they don’t understand what’s right and what’s wrong.
April 6, 2011 5:33 am|
Very disturbing; but at that moment you dont really know how to react.
There is no other species as ghastly as man. You are doing the right thing 🙂 Communicate, communicate and communicate to the kids and make them aware
April 6, 2011 4:00 pm|
I was in a bus once going to college when I noticed the driver asking one of the little schoolkids to stand very close to him (and was also touching etc). Like you, I was so disturbed ..though I was in that bus for barely 10mins. People victimising innocent children should be shot in my opinion. They should pay for their cheap thrills !
April 7, 2011 4:44 am|
I know Shilpa…its very disturbing…its like we are torn between two things on what to do and what not to do….
U do tend to regret the fact that u could’ve done something….
April 9, 2011 2:51 pm|
i can understand how you feel. very often we tend to remain quiet because we are not really sure if the person means to harm the child or is just getting cozy out of habit. There are many who are like that and don’t mean any thing. The other reason is that the person involved will deny having any intention to sexually abuse the child and the girl may not even know enough to understand one’s point. Above all no one wants confrontation unless very sure. In your place I might have done the same and worried later. I think if we decide to let the culprit know that we are aware of what might happen he may not dare to take any liberty. Public awareness is a must.
April 10, 2011 7:42 pm|
Sometimes, we simply don’t understand whether it’s a physical abuse or a healthy good touch…
When I was a child around my 3rd or 4th std, we had a house warming ceremony, and that evening, an uncle, who lived opposite to the new house was talking with me. He was trying to do something similar as touching my arms and legs, and I did felt uncomfortable. That was the age, I din’t even know the difference of sex, abuse or rather…But I could sense an uncomforted feeling…I ran away telling that my mom is calling me, and never saw that man again…
It’s good to keep the antennas open and look for some wrong cues always…especially in this highly exposed environment…
April 12, 2011 8:51 pm|
Very unnerving. 🙁
April 14, 2011 8:58 am|
I was watching Oprah’s show on child sexual abuse and it was an eye opener . How those creeps take advantage of the innocence of little girls and make them feel obligated at the same time . It shocks every time , i have reacted to such scenes a few times …like i would stare the man till he notices me and gets the message ….