Obedient Parents
A few days ago, we went to a kid’s birthday party. The friend asked me to be the official photographer at the party.
I gladly accepted the offer, as I love clicking pictures!
At the party, I was busy seeing though my lens and capturing the moments, when a 5 year old comes to me and asks me to show the pictures.
Now, everybody loves to see their pics, so I gladly obliged the lil’ fellow. He saw the pictures without any expression!
Next moment, he tells me that he wants the camera!!
I tried to deter him sweetly, but the child didn’t budge.
A few moments later, the child’s mother on seeing her child’s ‘interaction’ with a stranger, approaches us!
When she understands the situation, instead of diverting her child to something else or telling him firmly, she is giving me accusing looks for not giving in to the demands of her child!!
Hello!!?!! It’s perfectly fine with me, if you let your child play with your expensive phones, cameras, iPads etc, but please for heaven’s sake, DO NOT expect others to do so!! Shouldn’t the word ‘NO’ be in your dictionary when dealing with your kid!?
I thought today’s ‘educated’ moms would have the sense of what’s right and what’s not!! And would guide their children accordingly!
But alas! That’s not the case!!
PS: I am not an expert on parenting, I am not a Hitler Parent, my child is not an epitome of all goodness and I do not hate children.
I gladly accepted the offer, as I love clicking pictures!
At the party, I was busy seeing though my lens and capturing the moments, when a 5 year old comes to me and asks me to show the pictures.
Now, everybody loves to see their pics, so I gladly obliged the lil’ fellow. He saw the pictures without any expression!
Next moment, he tells me that he wants the camera!!
I tried to deter him sweetly, but the child didn’t budge.
A few moments later, the child’s mother on seeing her child’s ‘interaction’ with a stranger, approaches us!
When she understands the situation, instead of diverting her child to something else or telling him firmly, she is giving me accusing looks for not giving in to the demands of her child!!
Hello!!?!! It’s perfectly fine with me, if you let your child play with your expensive phones, cameras, iPads etc, but please for heaven’s sake, DO NOT expect others to do so!! Shouldn’t the word ‘NO’ be in your dictionary when dealing with your kid!?
I thought today’s ‘educated’ moms would have the sense of what’s right and what’s not!! And would guide their children accordingly!
But alas! That’s not the case!!
PS: I am not an expert on parenting, I am not a Hitler Parent, my child is not an epitome of all goodness and I do not hate children.
May 6, 2012 9:18 am|
Do we , anyone for that matter embark on parenting after graduating in the nuances of parenting?
No.
The incident you narrated is the shortest path to spoiling a child and the mother in question must beware. If she fails , it at the misery of herself and the peril of the innocent child.
June 5, 2012 3:22 pm|
Very well said Anil. I know this for sure that we can mould a child, any which way we want to…for eg. a small child can learn to eat everything or nothing at all, it all depends on what kind of efforts we put in as parents! What intrigues me is that today’s parent’s are well educated and far more informed as compared to the earlier generations, so they should be more aware of the right and the wrong way of bringing up kids!! But, alas…
May 6, 2012 10:47 am|
Today’s parents think that by giving in to all their children’s whims they are being great parents. At least this mother didn’t ask you give the camera to her ladla. I have seen parents do even that. If you refuse you are the Hitler, for sure 🙂
June 5, 2012 3:27 pm|
Yes, you are absolutely right! Also, giving in to the demands of the kids is the easiest way to buy peace! After all, it takes a lot of patience, time and energy to curb the lil one’s tantrums!
And yes, she gave me looks which said,’how could you bring misery to MY child?’ 😐
May 6, 2012 12:54 pm|
agree with you on this – kids are getting pampered and getting their demands fulfilled almost with no efforts…unfortunately for them adult life won’t be so kind and will face tough time handling disappointments..
June 5, 2012 3:41 pm|
You said it! When a child is used to getting everything he demands, it sure will affect his adult life too. The child will never be able to value things or money!!
May 6, 2012 4:02 pm|
oh what a true and correct observation.
I have encountered such growing brats apparently little fellow whom noise and mess creating habits are the cause of parents’ pride.
uf duniya kidher ko ja rhi hy.
June 5, 2012 3:47 pm|
Ah, these children are a nightmare when they visit your home! We once had friends’ kids at home and seeing so many toys and books and ‘new’ things in my child’s room, they just went crazy. They brought everything down, even the animal cushions kept on the bunk bed. After a while the kids came in the living room and started complaining about something, so somebody said, play with the toys in Aaryan’s room and they said, “There is no place to walk in the room!” I immediately went to the kid’s room and I had a heart attack…. they were so very right… every inch of the room’s floor was covered with toys, and their parts, cushions, pencils, crayons and even books!! And the mother never said a word to the kids and never offered to clean up the mess!! 😐
May 6, 2012 11:35 pm|
that’s too much! How do they even give such a look??
Parents of these days think that they want to fulfil every single desire of their kid. They will face real challenges in the future if they do not tune the child’s attitude / or change theirs and be a bit strict.
June 5, 2012 3:50 pm|
These are sure signs of bad parenting!! And this will surely have a bad effect on the child as he grows up! But the ones who need to know all this, believe that what they are doing is the best!
May 7, 2012 1:33 pm|
And I luv the P.S!
June 5, 2012 3:50 pm|
LOL 😀
May 7, 2012 1:36 pm|
Today’s parents have no time for their kids.
Easiest way out is to give them expensive toys(gadgets).
It is a pity,but,how true
June 5, 2012 4:04 pm|
Ah, the gadgets!! Lil ones having their personal Tabs and expensive mobiles… is way too much! In fact many parents take pride in their child possessing the latest gadgets!
May 11, 2012 9:14 am|
I can’t tell you how much this sort of behaviour enrages me! Parents who turn a blind eye when their precious child draws on your walls, or bangs on the laptop – because he is so interested in technology – already, you see!!!! Arghh! I can go on and on!
I agree totally with you – I am no parenting guru – but I feel that as parents we need to set boundaries of behavior. The word No does not come out from some parents! Last week, we had a small get-together for daughter’s birthday. One child licked the birthday cake! All of us were flabbergasted at that sort of behaviour – a three yr old – old enough to know better. Bt the mother was unaffected by it all! When I see some parents dealing with their children, I just wish they had some mandatory parenting lessons before they were allowed to become parents 🙁
June 5, 2012 4:36 pm|
I can so very understand all these bad parenting examples you shared… It’s really so very disgusting and annoying! Licking the cake… aargh!!
I have made it a point to be firm, I do not allow the kids to play with my laptop or drive cars on glass tops or jump on sofas. I know, it’s something which their moms should be doing, but since they are are quiet about it, I do the needful. I may not be popular among such kids or such moms, but a NO is a No at my place!
I am all for Mandatory Parenting Classes!! Wish somebody starts this!!
June 1, 2012 11:43 am|
Ahh experienced this behavior during my first trip to my SIL’s place. The nephew doesn’t know whats a “no”. 🙁
June 5, 2012 4:39 pm|
That’s so sad and bad! 🙁