Things are as they are, not as they should be!

Her Story So Far

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Unattached and Independent. Yes, these words define her. She has been like that for as long as she remembers. She has lived life on her own terms, always!o-single-woman-facebook.jpg

If she wanted to stay in bed all day, reading a book, she could do that without a care, without a second thought. She could pack her bags and leave for a vacation wherever and whenever. The freedom to follow her dreams and passions, she cherished that. Why, if a friend called her to accompany somewhere, she could say a yes or a no immediately as she needn’t check with anybody, ever.

In her world, she reigned supreme. A dream job, a dream house and a dream life. What else does one want?

She was single and living the dream!! Now wasn’t that simply perfect!!

And then her perfect world started looking a little less perfect! She had been feeling more lonely, over the last few months! No, it was not that she no longer enjoyed her company. No, she still needed her ‘me’ time especially after spending long hours with friends. But of late, she felt she was lonely than alone.

A surprising new feeling of talking to somebody when she was low was rearing its head. The usual methods of staying positive or allowing the bright her to cast a shadow on the dark her or relying on her mental toughness, were failing her regularly. Why was she feeling the need of a comforting arm or somebody to listen to her … Somebody to tell her to go back to sleep and that all would be ok in the morning. Or somebody to snuggle up to…

Being single was suddenly not looking so awesome!!

Now in her late 40s, she believed that love may be behind her and that chances of finding a like minded partner were very slim. And that was more so as she started feeling that she’s never going to have one! Was there something strange about her that puts people off? Or is it her success that makes her unapproachable.
She was too late, she thought.
Or was she?

Linking to the Write Tribe’s Wednesday Prompt : She was too late.

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 Image Courtesy : Google Images

30 Responses

  1. Shilpa, this is a very poignant narrative. Girls in their younger days enjoy their freedom, but as they grow old, a sense of loneliness overpowers them. I have seen many spinsters, who regret why they refused to get married in their youth.

  2. Still like to think the first half will ring truer… 🙂 I do believe that we can get companionship from someone who is not an intimate partner as well. Hard I know but not impossible… 🙂

  3. Whenever I see older people getting married in movies, I feel there is hope for everyone. Although marriage may not be important, companionship is and it is indeed never too late.

  4. If she wants to marry at 40+, after having experienced freedom in its truest sense, she will find everyday living of the married life (afterwards), sheer hell. By then, it may be too difficult to sort out the legal & personal issues that follow, and she might end up making huge compromises. In short, she will long for her earlier life.

    Destination Infinity

  5. Though I am just 23, I don’t know why I could completely understand what you wrote.. 😐 Amazing Shilpa 😛
    Visiting here after long..I think should come here more often 😛 😉

  6. Hmmm…..like they say “everything has its time and has to happen accordingly”.

    But to your question ” or was she?” i think shilpa, if she is lucky she could still find a partner. we know of many such famous celebrity weddings. Right?

  7. Nope, I don’t think she is too late Shilpa. Till now it was all about her priorities, she wanted a career first and hence she got it. Now if she thinks she wants to find someone to savour life’s finer tastes with, she will find that too. All in good time 😉

  8. When my daughter was growing up and was in skirts,I always told my wife that girls looked their best at a particular stage in life.How I wish girls grew up,without adding age …sounds stupid or funny?
    Aise Hota Nahin Hai…Kay Karen

  9. I don’t think its too late maybe she meets someone who is in a similar position as she is. Freedom always comes at a price. and here she is now feeling the pinch to share and cared . its rightly said , ‘Shaadi ka laddoo , khaye woh repent kare………’

  10. Hmm have seen such live examples. Sometimes it is too late to find a partner and even if they find one, it would be someone who is divorced or has kids etc. Atleast in India, it is very difficult to find someone at that age.

  11. Well we cant have everything in life, but I firmly believe that life does bless us with what is the best for us. It is never too late for love 🙂

  12. Freedom is enjoyable to a great extent. But freedom alone cannot define happiness. One always needs someone or the other to share their experiences, happiness, sorrows, worries, uncertainties with. A companion is required and you’ll definitely yearn for one some day. Better late than never.

  13. Very realistic narrative, Shilpa ji. It is the companionship that’s more important than marriage itself. I guess she’s not too late; she can still find a companion who will accept her the way she is and for all that she believes in. Catchy write up !

  14. I’m glad I didn’t accept the proposals of young men, when I was a young woman. The one who is trying to marry me now (and I’m in my forties) is the best I’ve ever known. Relationships are not restricted to youth, and if you’re good at them you will, firstly, love yourself – and eventually love someone who is also very old 🙂 Reflex Reactions

  15. very lovely write up. The prompt was used in a nice manner. I hope to read your other posts by tomorrow. You have an awesome blog here.

  16. Shilpa, please delete my earlier post for it is replete with typos . Thanks!

    Never say never, so in a way it is not too late. The reason that led to this situation was the urge to live only for oneself, for ‘me’: ‘I’ will get lost if I’m a part of ‘us’.

    I have found this sentiment growing among young women. The reasons for this are many. On the surface it is financial independence, empowerment through education and exposure, social acceptance of the single state, etc. Deeper down it could be growing up in a household where the woman was not given her due and trampled upon. Or it could be that, growing up in a nuclear family, the young woman never had to be responsible for anyone and is wary of taking on the responsibilities. Or it is just a wait for Mr.Right. Anyway, the ‘why’ is better understood by social scientists.

    Having been married for twenty-eight years, I will say that the ‘I’ is definitely not lost after marriage. It only grows stronger, and in a good way. Because you have multiple identities, you are a wife, mother, aunt, etc. you are more complete (and less lonely ). Why should these identities smother the ‘I’? Are we not daughters, and sisters? Don’t these identities enrich us? Would we have been better off growing up as orphans with only ourselves to please?

    All this comes with one small rider. We must give all that we expect. If we want a caring husband, we must become caring wives. It doesn’t make us doormats. We are intelligent enough to know where to draw the line. And if we respect ourselves, which is different from just being egoistic, others will do too.

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