My theme for this year’s Blogging from A to Z April Challenge is Marriage from A to Z in 55 Words. F is for Forgive and/or Forget!
She stared at the pictures with shocked disbelief.
Her heart was so hurt that she could feel the blood dripping.
Tears flowed the whole night to wash away the pain.
The morning after gave her the choice to stay angry, get even, or move ahead.
A look at her child and she knew her direction!
A Word to the Wise
You can check out my A-Z posts thus far by clicking on a highlighted letter!
119 Responses
This is great! And so true.
Best regards,
Elizabeth
Thank you Elizabeth 🙂
So true…one can’t hold grudges in a relationship!
Random Thoughts Naba
Oh yes, holding a grudge is like poisoning yourself slowly!
The issue is, if we forgive and forget, people may take advantage and continue their vile ways.
Destination Infinity
So what do you suggest that one should do?
I think it depends on what was there in the photograph. If it was something that can you can forgive or not. I completely agree with the quote but not with the protagonist’s reason for staying in the marriage 🙂
It is an opened ended story that is up for various interpretations. Agree with you staying in an unhappy marriage just for the sake of children is not right, but then each one has unique circumstances, so, I believe, right or wrong is just a perspective! 🙂
It’s so true …that there’s no meaning in holding grudges ….
Agree, grudges hurt relationships!
sometimes forgiving or forgetting is the only way to save a particular relation, be it any!
Yes, like they say, forgive and forget but never forget the lesson it taught you! 🙂
Forgiving is easy, forgetting not as much. But even if we don’t forget the hurt, we don’t have to dwell on it. I guess that is a form of ‘forgetting’, right?
Yes, you are right, the more we dwell on it, it is going to hurt us or cause inner turmoil, so I believe for our own sake, and for our inner peace, we must forget too!
Forgiving a wrong done to one is not the same as forgetting. Forgiving lets go of at least some of the pain. Forgetting is not taking practical steps to protect oneself if it happens again. IMO.
LuAnn Braley
AJ’s Hooligans @AtoZChallenge
Back Porchervations
I know what you mean, LuAnn. I guess, we must not forget the lesson it taught us and be cautious too. Forgetting is that it will not disturb our mental peace or make us bitter! 🙂
I’m not sure what she saw. However, I’m a little uncomfortable about people staying in their marriages because of their children. Don’t think that works, somehow.
I like how you left it all open to interpretation, Shilpa.
Agree with you, Corinne, in the long run such relationships do more harm than good. Thank you, glad you liked the open ended part! 🙂
What wonderful advice.
Glad you liked it, Glenda 🙂
“Her heart was so hurt that she could feel the blood dripping.” – awesome line… I really liked this. I do a lot of forgiving…. forgetting not so much! I’m looking forward to following you during A to Z challenge.
Hi Lucy! Good to see you here. Glad you liked this 55er! See you around 🙂
“The stupid neither forgive nor forget;
the naive forgive and forget;
the wise forgive but do not forget.”
― Thomas Szasz
True that! 🙂
I agree to forgive and forget is a virtue that leada to healthy relationship and happiness. But at the same time one should not stay in a relationship just for the sake of children. They should talk over about the situation at hand if the partner is genuinely sorry and amends can be made…well and good.
Yes, communication is the key and working on the issue together too!
Interesting that you left the final decision open ended. Depends on the magnitude of what she saw, of course.
But I agree with the quote that bearing a grudge doesn’t help.
Yes, she is the best person to decide depending on her circumstances!
Holding grudges is never a good thing in a marriage but staying married when you are miserable for the kids doesn’t seem like the right thing to do either. The kids will pick up on the misery, and will be miserable too. ♥
You raised a very important point, Kathy! Kids are so perceptive and the unhappy environment at home affects them too!
Wise words Shilpa! Forgive and forget. One of the main mantras of a good marriage 🙂
Agree! 🙂
True, grudges cannot be held for long, especially in a marriage. And kids make us forget such things too soon. But, staying in a marriage just because there are kids is equally difficult, because the strain will inevitably show in the long run. I love the open end to your story, here. Either way, hope she’s happy !
Fingers crossed for her 🙂
Beautifully composed,55er. Yes, small things can be forgiven and forgetten when you are in love, shilpa. Although “forget and forgive” is a difficult task for people with good memory.
I believe, forgiving is easier than forgetting!
Beautiful.
Thank you SG 🙂
Forgiving is fine. Forgetting, not so fine. Finally, it is important to do what makes one happy. Because right and wrong are a point of view.
Well done, Shilpa. So brave of you to 55-it through the challenge!
I so agree with “it is important to do what makes one happy. Because right and wrong are a point of view.”
Brave?? I guess it is rather suicidal 😀
Wow this is brilliant Shilpa… You are hitting one sixer after the other with your stories.
Thank you Raj 🙂
In a way it really doesn’t matter what she saw in the picture, as long as she made a choice that was right for her…at least for now. The future will reveal itself when the future comes. But what matters is the choice she made at this moment…and only she can know what is right for her. As others have said, the open-ended-ness of this piece of writing speaks a lot in its silence 🙂 Very well done!
Beauty Interprets, Expresses, Manifests the Eternal
Beloo, I so agree with you when you say, “But what matters is the choice she made at this moment…and only she can know what is right for her” Thanks 🙂
Hmmmm – feel I am very curious what she saw in that picture now… But its true: – life is full of choices, so sometimes you have to decide “is this something I can forgive, forget and live with — or is it not”… If it is compromising own happiness maybe it is something that can not be forgiven…. But once the decision is taken I believe in putting it behind and move forward.. Thoughtful post today Shilpa- I enjoyed it:-)
Agree with you Eli, she is the best person to decide and ‘once the decision is taken I believe in putting it behind and move forward’. Thank you, glad you enjoyed today’s 55er 🙂
I agree that sometimes we need to take a decision to save our own dignity. If I was in her place I would walk away but not without confronting. Love your 55 fictions 🙂
Hmmm…. yes, getting the facts right is important before taking any step!
Thanks Prasanna. I’d like to know your blog URL. This is leading to your gravatar!
This is so true!! We either have a choice to remain angry or move on! where the former gives us more hurt, the latter can help us be happy once again!
You are spot on, Swathi! 🙂
Beautiful post, Shilpa. Sometimes, we need to go with the flow or decide at the same time, which makes it a tough call.
Yes but then the biggest decisions in life are never easy!
Liked the short fiction. There are all possibilities and everyone makes a choice based on her other perspectives. That is the best for that person in the given circumstances. Nothing right or wrong there….
Yes, agree with you, there is no right or wrong. Just perspective and opinion.
True story…I know quite a few who do this and children who grow up are largely insecure n scared of getting into marriages themselves…a very dangerous setting…
Awesome post again Shilpa….n again I got the same word 🙂
Great minds think alike 😀
There is one dialogue which I remember from a Tamil Movie.
“Second chance is the best gift you can give to someone you love and if you really love them second chance is the best gift you can give to yourself”
So true!! Forgiving and forgetting is the best way to live in peace!!
My mom says.. Things that can be forgotten should be forgiven and those that can’t be forgiven should be forgotten!!
Those were some wise words from the movie and your mom. Thanks for sharing, Sri 🙂
forgive but never forget Shilpa!
I would say, forgive but never forget… the lesson, Meenaaaa 🙂
Very true Shilpa. Every body can forget but to forgive, you need a great heart and broadmindedness.
Kindly read my post ,The Sunshine Award.
Yes, we do need a big heart to forgive!
Congratulations for the award Ma’am and thanks a lot for sharing it with me and for your kind words too! ! ♥
That’s a tough one.. to forgive and forget. It’s so easy to drown in self-pity and to continue to hold the grudge.
Agree, but then it will do us no good and will only harm us, poison us, and kill us from inside!
Good story Shilpa. Betrayal of some sort- anguish and hurt and the choices the lady can make…No right and wrong only what is best for her and her dear ones 🙂
Yes, there are no “Right” or “Wrong”… Just different perspectives!
Hey your and/or in the title put me into a little discomfort 😕
But yeah agree with you ’55’.
Why the discomfort, Satya? It is an open ended story, you can pick whatever suits your sensibilities! 🙂
so true…..forget/forgive without holding grudges is the thing to do if we want to move on in life 🙂
Absolutely!
Great minds thinks alike Shilpa. But you said it all brilliantly in just 55 words. However, sometimes that choice is not so easy to make and sometimes it comes back to bite us.
I saw that Suzy 😀
Agree, but then such is life!! 😐
forgive..dat is d best choice ..best you can do to yourself…
True that!
Beautiful post!! And I truely agree with you. Forgive and forget but never forget what it has taught you… 🙂
Thank you Shailin! 🙂
Lovely story you have here…what is needed probably is also the wisdom to choose the limit of forgive and forget…
Yes, that’s important too!
true that!! what a coincidence..my topic for today happens to be the same too!! 🙂
Great minds… 😀
Feeling the blood dripping is a powerful image. My thoughts are I don’t believe forgiveness is authentic if it is done for the sake of anybody but ourselves… Some things are impossible to forget, but forgiveness does take the pain of anger away Reflex Reactions
Agree with you, Ida, that forgiveness does take the pain of anger away!!
Forgiveness is not just to save others…it’s also for ourselves.
Oh yes, it is for us, more, I believe!
For me, it would depend on the nature of the transgression whether I’d forget. No doubt forgiveness comes at some point, or it should, for one’s own health, and definitely for the wellbeing of the child. But for me it wouldn’t necessarily be a “I will stay with him.”
Agree with you Trisha, forgiveness gives that inner calm and we must do that for our own well being!
Yeah, holding grudges can suck the life out of us. It’s always helpful to be reminded to let go of that baggage.
Thanks!
Sheri at Writer’s Alley
Home of Rebel Writer CREED 2014Mighty Minion Bureau Team #atozchallenge
Letting Go should be the buzz word 🙂
Forgiving is yes.
Forgetting is a bit hard
I know, but then we must try to do that for our own mental peace!
Another wonderful story. I hope she chose to move on and do what was best for her child.
Hope so, Teresa 🙂
That is true Shilpa, no one gains anything by holding on to grudges, this thought struck a chord with me..
Agree, Buddha said it so beautifully, holding grudges is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned!!
Shilpa,
Very true but extremely difficult or impossible at times when one may have to compromise self respect, like in case of domestic violence or perpetually wandering partner.
Take care
When the forgiving and forgetting does not work, one has to take a call, I believe!
Wonder what she decided. I hope she made the right choice and not one for her child’s sake. Some wrongs can never be forgiven and forgotten.
Hope so, Sulekha! 🙂
Wonderfully put Shilpa, while it is not easy to forgive and forget, more often than not it is in our own interest to move on without holding grudges.
Agree with you, completely, Reshma!
Touching story. Maybe she’s wrong in making a compromise. Maybe she’s right in making a sacrifice for the sake of her kid. It’s hard to be a judge. Also, none of us know the husband’s side of the story.
I’d also like to know the other woman’s side of the story.
Cheers
CRD
Updated my blog with a poem. Hope you’ll like it. Do drop by.
http://www.scriptedinsanity.blogspot.in
I like the way you thought about the man and the other woman, CRD 😀
Wow. Short and sweet and powerful. The more we hold grudges the more we torture ourselves. Love your theme. Will start reading it from the beginning 🙂
True that! Holding grudges are bad for our own self. Thanks Ashwini, glad you liked this theme 🙂
True.. no point in holding grudges.
True. It’s our loss only!
Wonder what she saw in the PIC….
Love your 55fiction
😀 Thanks Sitara 🙂
Holding onto a grudge hurts you, not the person you think deserves your anger.
Well said, Damaria. For all we know, the person must have forgotten all about it while we are thinking and resenting it day in and day out!
A wise man saying… Fools forgive and forget..The wise forgive but never forget 🙂
PhenoMenon
http://throodalookingglass.com/2014/04/gymnema-sylvestre/
Wise words, indeed 🙂
I would say quite disturbing but powerful and thought provoking. I admire the way how you’ve woven tales about life, disappointment and unexpected surprised plus upsets life throws at us. One should never give up hope and finds essence in the beauty of life.
Thanks Vishal 🙂
Not as easy as it sounds, but that’s the best possibly way to regain faith and trust. Superb piece.
If there is resentment there can never be a true relationship.
Really enjoyed this story… she knew what she had to do… good on her!